Volcano Jokes

Friend 1: what did the volcano say
to the other volcano?
Friend 2: Nothing. Volcanoes are inanimate
objects that do not possess the ability
to speak
Friend 1: You killed it.

BRB, LOL and Cool

What does BRB, LOL and
Cool mean?

BRB = I don’t want to talk to you anymore
LOL = I have nothing else to say
COOl = I really don’t care

I hate everyone

I definitely feel like
you hate me

I hate everyone so you
shouldn’t take it personally.

I have killed you several times

So we’re cool now right?
You seem calm enough,
I am thinking you’re not
mad anymore.

I may look calm, but in
my mind I have killed you
several times.

Monopoly Games

I almost went to jail today.
I was so scared.
Those monopoly games
get pretty intense.

Seat on the bus Joke

Son: Mom, when I was on the
bus with dad this morning
he told me to give up
my seat to a lady.

Mom: Well, you have done
the right thing.

Son: But mom, I was sitting on
daddy’s lap.

I paid

Son: I have an iphone
Daughter: I have an ipod
Wife: I have an ipad
Dad: I paid for all this.

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